Whether you have an established custody order or you are in the middle of a custody dispute in Oklahoma, it doesn’t change the fact that it is a heart-breaking event when your child comes to you stating they do not want to return to their other parent’s house.
Red flags should immediately go up. Therefore, understanding why your child feels this way is imperative.
Abuse or neglect could be occurring, a new girlfriend or boyfriend may be bullying your child, new siblings may be getting more attention, or your child doesn’t want to be left in childcare all the time. Regardless of your relationship with your ex, you are now in a custody dispute in Oklahoma.
Several Avenues You Can Take With the Court
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- In an emergency, a court can issue an emergency order. Before requesting an emergency custody hearing, make sure to file a police report identifying the emergency or a report with the Department of Human Services. If you are not able to file a report before filing for the emergency custody hearing, make sure to attach to the request for emergency hearing an independent declaration from a witness including the date, time, and incident description. The court must act within 72 hours of receiving the emergency hearing request. If the court fails to act, you can appeal this decision and the court must respond within 24 hours. During the emergency hearing, a judge will issue a temporary custody order with a later court date to re-evaluate the custody arrangement.
- Develop evidence if the reasons have merit. If your child is not complaining of abuse or neglect, discuss with your child why they don’t want to go back to their other parent’s house. Have your child keep notes about how they feel when they are there as well. Ask teachers and your child’s friends’ parents if they notice if your child is having a hard time at their other parent’s house, and if so, whether they would be willing to write a declaration regarding what they have seen or heard. Teacher’s can be great advocates for what is best for a child. Asking your child’s teacher if the other parent packs a sufficient lunch, gets your child to school on time during their custody days, or whether your child expresses his dislike of going to his other parent’s can help you uncover why your child is asking to not stay at his other parent’s house. Keep detailed records and present this evidence at your next custody hearing.
- Enlist the help of a counselor. If your child is not comfortable discussing the other parent with you, having a counselor talk to your child can be very helpful. Many counselors are experienced in providing therapy to children of divorced or separated parents. Counselors can use their skills to help children identify issues they normally aren’t able to discuss with their parents. A counselor will be able to document the sessions and use this documentation to testify at a custody hearing as an expert. Typically, the opinions of qualified experts weigh heavily in favor of determining the best interests of the child.
- Appoint an attorney or a guardian ad litem. A court may appoint an attorney to represent the child and the child’s stated interests. If the child wishes to remain with the mother, the attorney representing the child will advocate on the child’s behalf for that result. However, if the child is appointed a guardian ad litem, then that representative seeks to advocate on behalf of the child’s best interests — which may or may not conflict with what the child wants. Much like a social worker, a guardian ad litem will conduct investigations; seek to fully understand the child’s life, interactions, and activities; and determine the best custody arrangement for the child.
Free Consultation With A Tulsa Divorce Lawyer
The divorce process is what you make it — the higher the conflict, the more expensive your case becomes. Hiring a skilled and experienced Tulsa divorce attorney ensures your rights are protected and explains all necessary and unnecessary steps in the process.
Contact an experienced Tulsa divorce lawyer when you need to go through the Oklahoma divorce process.
For a free, confidential consultation, call 918-924-5526 now.
