A Tulsa child custody dispute is one of the most contentious areas between divorcing spouses in Oklahoma.
Emotions run high during any Tulsa divorce, but when we feel that our children’s well being may be jeopardized by our ex-spouse, our emotions can run between anxiety and outright fear, especially if substances are being abused by the other spouse or there has been a past history of verbal or physical aggression or violence.
In a child custody dispute, you need an experienced Tulsa child custody attorney.
When in Doubt, Document Everything
You cannot always be sure what a court might find persuasive and important when it comes to an Oklahoma child custody dispute. So it is best to document everything.
Give the documentation to your Tulsa child custody attorney. He or she will know what the courts will want to see.
Because we forget details and dates, it is always a good idea to keep a journal. Journal all contacts between your children and your ex. This includes pickup and drop-off times, and any missed appointments or late arrivals.
Chronicle how your child reacts to seeing the other parent, and how the child appears to you when returned. It is especially important to chronicle any mood changes, emotional outbursts, or changes in behavior that you observe either in the child or in the other parent if you happen to witness them.
Children may not always talk about what goes on while they are with the other parent, but if you see a formerly secure child begin to exhibit regressive behaviors such as bed wetting or thumb-sucking, this should be documented with as much detail as possible.
If your child is verbal and has complaints about the other parent or about time spent with that parent, make sure and include those in your journal. Be sure and enter items into your journal as they occur.
The contemporaneous chronicling of events is persuasive to the court during a child custody dispute. So write things down as they occur instead of entering them once a week or month.
Do not prompt your child to talk about the other parent, but do make note of their spontaneous comments. Avoid talking to your child about the Tulsa child custody dispute. You want to normalize the process as much as possible for your child.
Additional Child Custody Dispute Considerations
Sometimes an abusive ex will use friends or family members to pick up and drop off. Journal any abusive comments or behaviors that your ex’s friends or family members engage in. Journal whether these occur in the presence of your children.
Make sure and document your expenses. Keep invoices and receipts, especially for things that you purchase for your child such as clothing, medical expenses, and school supplies.
Include any expenses for extra-curricular activities that your child engages in. These are important in a Tulsa child custody dispute. They show continued care and nurturance of your child.
Finally, make sure that you note the reactions and comments of teachers, friends, and extended family members regarding your child. Sometimes, teachers are the first to be aware of a problem as the child makes the transition between households. If a child is hungry or disheveled when he or she is dropped off at school by your ex, these observations may be persuasive in a child custody dispute.
Free Consultation: Tulsa Child Custody Attorney
Your choice of an Oklahoma divorce attorney is critical, especially regarding any issues about child custody in Tulsa. Before you retain our family law attorneys, you are invited to have a free, confidential, no-obligation consultation to help you determine whether our family law services can meet your particular needs.
For a free consultation with a Tulsa child custody attorney about your concerns, call the Divorce Law Office of Tulsa today at 918-924-5526.