Many divorcing couples consider hiring one attorney for both spouses as a way to cut down on costs, create less paperwork, and reduce complications. This may sound great, however, ethically attorneys cannot represent both spouses in a divorce action. But there are other options available, especially in Oklahoma — like mediation.
This may not seem like a big ethical concern. However, the Oklahoma State Bar as well as many other state bars believe it is a serious issue for one attorney to represent opposing parties.
For example, if an attorney represented you and your spouse, and your spouse told your attorney that they are going to construct a structure on the property. This construction would have the negative consequence of driving down the family home value. Yet, your spouse tells the attorney not to tell you about it. Where does the attorney place their loyalty?
This is why having your own attorney fighting for your interests is necessary in a divorce case. However, if you and your spouse are on good terms and think a neutral third party can help you navigate the divorce process effectively, then you should consider mediation.
Mediation
Mediation is a straight-forward process where both spouses meet with a third party called a mediator. They are often attorneys, too. The mediator can assist you and your spouse in completing the divorce process, including paperwork and filing requirements.
The mediator can also help settle key issues in a divorce case such as:
- How to divide assets and debts
- Custody decisions
- Parenting plans
- Visitation
- Child support
- Spousal support
The mediator is able to give general legal information, case law, statutes, etc., but cannot give you advice. Legal advice must only come from a divorce attorney, by law.
Mediator verses Separate Attorneys
As previously mentioned, a lot of mediators — especially divorce mediators — are attorneys, but you can have a mediator as well as an attorney in your corner. A mediator facilitates communication, a divorce attorney advocates on your behalf. A divorce attorney can give you advice on what to ask for and what to compromise on, a mediator can tell you legal information only.
Hiring a mediator during the divorce process, whether you have a divorce attorney or not, produces positive results such as:
- Keeping fees low — the less you are in the courtroom, the less expensive your bill will be.
- Less stress — the mediator helps effective communication take place.
- Your divorce case is shorter — having effective communication increases compromises which leads to a faster settlement.
- Using a mediator keeps you out of the courtroom.
- In general, both parties end up feeling more satisfied with the result when they feel they had a hand in negotiating.
The Mediation Process
The mediation process is quite simple and usually only takes one or two sessions with the mediator to complete. First, the mediator will introduce themselves to both spouses, lay out ground rules, explain how the session will run, and ask for questions from both spouses.
Next, the mediator will either ask one spouse to leave the room or ask one spouse to give an opening statement concerning what is most important for them to accomplish in the session. Depending on the mediator, they may want all discussion to be on a one-on-one basis instead of with the other spouse present. Your divorce attorney can also attend the mediation sessions.
Both spouses will have a chance for an opening statement, in each other’s presence or not, and then the mediator will start going down the list of issues that are unsolved pertaining to the divorce action. The mediator with meet with each spouse separately numerous times trying to reach a compromise on the outstanding issues and encourage a settlement.
A settlement eventually is reached, there is a high success rate for mediated divorces, and a marital settlement agreement is signed by both parties. A marital settlement agreement is not appealable, so once you sign, you are finished with the divorce process!
Free Consultation with a Tulsa Divorce Attorney
Consulting with an attorney as soon as possible in this situation is very important in order to preserve your rights and make sure terms of your settlement are fair. An attorney can help you prepare for a mediation session and advise you on what to expect during the mediation session.
Hiring a knowledgeable and compassionate family law attorney will ensure the process is expertly conducted and your interests are well represented.
Contact an experienced Tulsa family law attorney when you need to go through the Oklahoma divorce process.
For a free confidential consultation, call now: 918-924-5526.
